Do not keep to yourself, or Something about the importance of expressing emotions
Our society, unfortunately, does not know how to prioritize this issue.
We want too much to be intelligent. And when a person reacts too violently to an event-unimportantly, sad or joyful, he automatically becomes an unintelligent hysterical character, with whom it is not comme il faut
Nobody wants to be an undesirable member of society, so we are taught from childhood to control their emotions. “You're a boy! Don't cry! ”Or“ You're a girl! Be more restrained! "But no one thinks how much harm to us causes suppression of feelings. This is especially true of negative emotions.
If time after time a person will accumulate a negative in himself, sooner or later this storehouse of pain and experience simply will not survive. One of the signs of the destructive effect of unexpressed emotions is an unsatisfactory physical state. The person simply starts to hurt.He constantly gets tired, is lazy, wants to sleep, even if he has slept for a sufficient number of hours, is upset because of little things, is indifferent to his own appearance. If you find these symptoms in yourself, you may be in the grip of repressed emotions.
Another, even more dangerous way - care in addiction. In order to overcome the accumulated grievances, a person can begin to eat, consume alcohol or even drugs. Dependence for a while allows you to get rid of the burden of repressed emotions, but it’s still impossible to escape from them finally. It turns out a vicious circle of suffering and dependence.
What to do?
- To realize that the expression of feelings is absolutely normal, because our emotions are markers that show how we assess this or that situation. You can ignore the rudeness of a saleswoman in a supermarket - this is normal, but if it has angered you - this is also absolutely normal!
- Get rid of the fear of spoiling the impression of yourself. Well, yes, it is worth asking a friend to stop chatting incessantly, as she immediately becomes the number one enemy. Fearfully? Stop being afraid. At first everyone will be shocked by your straightness, but then they will get used to it.Remember that by openly expressing your feelings, you are teaching people to respect you and your point of view.
- Get rid of the negative gradually and do not overdo it. If yesterday you were a meek girl, and today you call your boss a goat and remind your parents of all your childhood offenses, then you can go on a rampage in the nuthouse. Graduation is your friend. Scroll through the situations that worry you the most, and start analyzing them one by one. The main thing is to learn to express emotions without aggression.
- Honestly talk about your feelings, not minimizing and not exaggerating them: “I hate”, “I am disappointed”, “It is insulting” - so that a person does not puzzled over what oppresses you. Describe the situation that bothers you directly to someone who is related to this situation. Do not force others to pull ticks out of you. People who are offended and answer all the questions "Everything is in order," cause only irritation.
- Play sports. No matter how trite it sounds, physical exertion really helps to cope with the emotions that have accumulated during the day. And it is not at all necessary to bash someone in the ring.It’s just that the fact of changing activities, conditions, people around has a beneficial effect on our psyche. It really works, do not ignore this point!
And one more tip: do not suppress the emotions of other people. If one of your loved ones has had a grief and is inconsolable, NEVER try to calm him down with the words “Well, well, do not cry”! On the contrary, let him spill the emotions, let him cry as much as he wants. Otherwise, the emotional experience of pain will remain with him for a very long time, and negative emotions will begin to destroy him from the inside. A dirty phrase that all diseases from nerves is not an empty sound. Take care of yourself and your health!
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