Raising a son is difficult, but interesting
Raising a child, be it a girl or a boy, is a complex and serious process that begins literally from the first months of his life, and leaves an imprint on all subsequent years.
In order for a little boy, who was always a sweet and beloved toddler, to grow up into a real and adult man, able to live his entire subsequent life with dignity, it is necessary not only to stuff him with vitamins and change clean shirts in time.
So that one day your baby wakes up a real man, you need to work daily and tirelessly on his upbringing, and only then it is possible that you will see a worthy person in your future.
Unfortunately, in modern society, the concept of the definition of a “real man” is quite vague; everyone puts in him something of his own, which is not always correct and proper. For example, today, sadly enough, men often lack manliness, decisiveness and courage, honor and loyalty to the lady of the heart — they sank deeply and for a long time, however, there are still pleasant exceptions.
Caring and forever worrying mothers, they always try to help their son, they teach them to avoid problems, to bend around them, so to speak, so increased care harms than brings up a man.
Fortunately, the values and customs of the past are being revived, young parents dream of raising such a person for whom they can be proud, and for this it is important to know how to properly raise a son.
We will not hide, it is not easy, boys are naturally more restless and restless than girls, they have a lot of curiosity and energy that needs to be sent in the right direction.
The main problem of recent generations is the insane pace of life, which constantly steals precious time, which has not been spent on its own children. We are so eager to do everything that we forget about the most important thing: children are not weeds, they can not be planted, but suddenly something will grow up, they need care, attention and parental control, regardless of whether the boy is a girl or a girl.
Neuropsychologists, after a long study of the relationship between parents and children, came to a disappointing conclusion: boys are more often beaten and more painfully punished,they are less likely to be embraced and taken in their arms, and after all, the presentation of too high demands to the boys can lead to nervous breakdowns and bouts of aggression.
The main stages of the development of boys
It turns out that the whole process of reincarnation of a boy into a real man can be conditionally divided into three main stages, depending on which one you are in, your attitude towards the child should change.
- First stage: gentle years. This is a period from about two to six years, during this period your boy is a beloved sissy who is allowed much, he is pampered and surrounded by boundless love and care. Interestingly, already at about the age of 6 months, the child begins to distinguish the surrounding people by gender, he understands where the mother is, and where the pope. From about two years old he begins to understand what belongs to boys, and, therefore, it’s time to show him what it means. The main person and reference point for him during this period is his mother.
- The second stage: the manifestation of interest. The duration of this stage is from 6 to 14 years, an important period when the boy begins to show an interest in masculinity, he seeks to learn how to be a man. It is very important that during this period he had a decent example to follow, of course, the best option is the father, he comes to the fore during this period, the mother becomes a reliable, caring and loving rear.
- Third stage: adolescence and becoming a man. The age from 14 to the age of majority is a difficult and important period when serious problems and difficulties can begin, because today your boy is a teenager who is preparing to become an adult man. Parents often fade into the background, the boy will try to find his own guidelines and hobbies, the main task for the parents is to find such a male mentor for him, a leader who can fully prepare him for adulthood. The most important thing at this stage is to develop in the boy the feelings of independence, responsibility and self-esteem that he will need in his adult life.
The boundaries between the periods should not be clear and sharp, if he is 6 years old today, this does not mean that the child will run sharply to become a real man, the transition should take place smoothly, with preliminary preparation.
Naturally, the best option is to raise a child in a full-fledged family, where both parents participate in the process, experience and years of experience show that in this case the chances of raising a decent and harmonious personality increase many times.
But cases where a boy is raised without a father are not uncommon today, but it doesn’t matter if the mother learns to behave correctly and also finds a good example to follow, and not necessarily, this will be a real man, then the process of upbringing should go without any problems .
From birth to 6 years
As we have already said, during this period there are no particular differences, you bring up a boy or a girl, at this age all children, in equal amounts, require care, attention, love and affection, they should feel that they are important to their family.
True, at the age of three years there are still some differences: boys are worse than girls are experiencing a break with their mother, therefore, if there is a possibility, it is better for a child to be brought up at home until three or four years old.
The main difficulties may lie in the character of the baby: there are more active and restless, but this does not mean at all that they must be constantly pacified and forced to sit quietly.
Notice how the dads walk with the kids on the playground, they do not constantly shout, “Get away from the swing!”, “Don't climb trees!”. Surprisingly, they stand side by side or actively help the child to overcome the barrier, while carefully insuring and supporting the child.
The boy must learn this, overcome difficulties and achieve the goal, but at the same time know that he has strong support.
From 6 to 14 years
It is very important to involve the future man in all men's cares: dad should become a real example, because at this age the boys idealize their father and try to copy it completely.
If the father himself does not adhere to any rules, and in the house there is a strict discipline only for the child himself, then he will quickly break down and begin to show increased aggression, rudeness, nervous breakdowns and runaway from the house are possible.
If the father does not help the mother, does not put the socks in the basket, and after work is placed on the sofa with a newspaper, instead of doing men's chores, then the child will very quickly absorb a similar pattern of behavior.
From 14 to adulthood
It's hard when yesterday's obedient kid becomes rude, sometimes inadequate, and with a dramatically changing mood, a teenager.How to react to his attacks, and can they really be avoided?
Try to provide your son with a mentor, if he is not the father, then look for sections or clubs of interests, where the coach will be the man who works for the cause, and not for the “need”.
Slip the necessary literature to your child, leave it in a prominent place, the father still plays the decisive role here: go fishing together, go hiking, help your mom with housework and learn how to earn money.
The process of becoming cannot happen in one day, it will take many months before yesterday's boy to learn responsibility, autonomy and learn to achieve his own goals.
Do not forget, your boy will never become a real man, if you do not allow him to make decisions on his own, albeit mistakenly mistaken for you, he should understand this with a personal example.
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